cornerofmadness

THAT is what my secretary told me today when I asked her to be sure there was a room for my large class (which she failed to do this semester). Rather than just saying okay yes I made a mistake, drop it (which she did say) she started screaming at me about how everyone was sick of me and I needed to shut up. The departmental chair was there, jaw dropped. I was too stunned to say anything. I left. I SHOULD report her but she's also the secretary for the provost and I'm up for promotion. I can just imagine how much shit he'd hear about me from her if I turned her in. I WILL talk to the chair and see what she wants to do if anything. This is the second time this semester alone she's treated me like that (she did something similar to TH too just a few weeks ago). The first time she accused me of breaking something I didn't even touch. But this was the worst.

I've been very upset all because of that 'we' comment. I highly doubt there is a 'we' but it plays right into my lifelong insecurities about people just barely tolerating me and wishing I'd go away. (mostly because people have spent half my life telling me this when I was young.) Like I needed another reason so think my existence is worthless.

To top it off my sugar was over 300 this morning and then fell to 79 by lunch.

And TRULY top off the suck salad the screaming invalid I share the wall with moved back in. I THOUGHT she was in a nursing home for good. She is of course already fucking screaming. She was gone for three months. I was so hoping.

There IS good news. No great news. I have high speed internet with Frontier. He showed up, but he wasn't the guy who called me. He was a major SF geek and was fun to talk to. He did say my laptop was slow. It is. I think it has a virus or 20 on it. SIgh. At least it works.