Mar. 22nd, 2021

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Because I needed more bad news I can't even talk about my surgery until after my vascular appt on the 5th because I need to be off the blood thinners. I'm not sure how to handle at least 3 more weeks in a home and then even more weeks after surgery. I didn't know that until I called the doc's office and they didn't know why. My question is why so damn long for a consultation. nearly 3 weeks in this dressing unchanged in spite of the pain and the diabetes etc.

Worse at 2 AM I called for my pain pill groggily. Then I realize I can't feel my leg from the knee down. AT. All. The nurse ran in seeing the panic in my face. My leg had swollen against the brace so badly, the circulation was cut off. We iced it down and it was okay

So now the heart has gone out of me. Yes I know keeping a positive attitude helps healing. Telling me that doesn't always help. I should be allowed to grieve some.

And then the parents went down to get my car but they turned around and went right back with it. I'm so pissed at Dad for that. They're getting too old for that. They could have stayed the night in my apt but he wouldn't hear of it.

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cornerofmadness

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